Re:byles jestes bedziesz

31 maja 2018

zycie w USA w nieswiadomosci 🙂

Did you hear in the news that a 747 recently crashed in a cemetery in Poland?

The Polish officials have so far retrieved 2000 bodies.

Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside a theater?

They were waiting to see the movie „Closed for the Winter.”

Can you speak polish? (No.)

Can you understand polish?(No.)

Can you read polish? (No.)

How does it feel to be dumber than a polack?

Turn Signal

An English guy is driving with a Polish guy as his passenger, when he decides to pull over because he suspect that his turn signal may not be working.

He asks the Polish guy if he doesn’t mind stepping out of the car to check the lights while he tests them.

The Polish guy steps out and stands in front of the car.

The English guy turns on the turn signal and asks, „Is it working?”

To which the Polish guy responds, „Yes, it’s working….No, it’s not working….Yes, it’s working….No, it’s not working….”

Accident in Warsaw

Did you hear about the terrible automobile accident in Warsaw last night?

A polish family on vacation lost all of their children.

The pickup truck they were riding in ran off the road into a lake and sank to the bottom.

The parents got out of the cab OK but all the kids in the back drowned…they couldn’t get the tailgate open.

Three Men

Three men are traveling in the Amazon, a German, an American, and a Polak, and they get captured by some Amazons.

The head of the tribe says to the German, „What do you want on your back for your whipping?”

The German responds, „I will take oil!”

So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him 10 times.

When he is finished the German has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move.

The Amazons haul the German away, and say to the Polak, „What do you want on your back?”

„I will take nothing!” says the Polak, and he stands there straight and takes his 10 lashings without a single flinch.

„What will you take on your back?” the Amazons ask the American.

He responds, „I’ll take the Polak!”

Dirty Tampons

A Polak, an American, and a German had a room full of dirty tampons, and they decided to have a contest to see who could stay in there the longest.

First it was the American’s turn. The other two locked him in the room and waited. A week later, they heard him whimpering and pounding on the door so they let him out.

„That is the sickest smell I have ever endured!” cried the American. „I couldn’t stay in there another minute!”

Next it was the German’s turn. After a month he finally banged on the door to be let out. „Oh God, that is the most putrid smell in the world! I couldn’t take it another minute!” he cried as he gasped for breath.

Finally it was the Polak’s turn. They locked him in the room and waited. A week went by, a month, a year.

The German and American heard nothing. Finally they began to worry, so they yelled through the door, „You can come out now! You’ve won the contest by far!”

To which the Polak yelled back, „No, not yet! I’m not done eating the jelly donuts.”

Whore House

Man goes to a whore house. The Madam is out of women but, since the guy is Polish she thinks she can get away with a blow up doll and he will never know the difference.

Being a bit nervous because she has never tried this one before, The Madam waits outside the door.

The Ploack comes out in five minutes. „How was it?”, says the Madam.

„I don’t know,” says the Polak, „I bit her on the tit and she farted and flew out the window!”


Three men were all applying for the same job as a detective. One was Polish, one was Jewish, and one was Italian.

Rather than ask the standard questions during the interview, the chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer.

When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked, „Who killed Jesus Christ?”

The Jewish man answered without hesitation „The Romans ki

ile tego jeszcze przytoczyc 20 … 50 … 100 …

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